something better not read

i find it that i love to blog when im really frustrating or just having those mood sessions again. its not like i want to but its due to over thinking and ppl's reaction/response. i really hate it, i mean REALLY hate it when i text ppl and they dont reply. i understand if no credit cuz i would end up calling but when got credit and they dont? im just *wow, u did that to me arr? nice* that kinda reaction. sounds harmless but deep inside, !@#@$#%$^&* on most ppl. MOST PPL ok? -ok sensitive issue now- really makes me indescribable deep inside when she don reply me. im just harr? don worry....still tahan-ning. just dunno till when only can survive. no wonder my pimples all appearing again. sigh. talking bout this, i hate man. i really hate man. not cuz im anto guy but due to the emotional part of a man. man can get so so so jealous over small things. lemme put a scenario, if A takes B's camera and snaps pics with C and ignores all about A except to ask: "how to change the mode ar?" then turn back to C and snap more. and if A sits there and see all this, u think A can tahan or not? *note: B is girl and C is guy =)* generally guys will be jealous but some man, some VERY DAMN RARE guys, can tahan. i think evan of all guys will also cannot tahan. hmmm. basket!!!! u guys dont have to fit it who is who and what is what. we just play anonymous here. im outta energy to frust anymore. all i know now is i wanna say many things but i can simply say it but it has to take its place at the right time. like su min said, 70% in the mind but only 30% in the action. i guess i gotta spend my 30% wisely. but till then, it is bloody consuming me inside. tomorrow afternoon need run for telematch. im thinking of calling theen kin or ibnu or po hin and say, "hey, im not ok now mentally so im not gonna run today. thanks and good luck in finding a replacement. u guys are the best =)" i wonder what will happen to me then? oh well. its just !@!#$@#%$^%&^*&(*)(_()(*&*^&^% right now and im off to bed. screw the post. ill edit it later